Wed

Just Try Before you decide there's no way you could ever possibly do what 'they' have asked of you, take a moment to think about exactly what it involves. You may be so frustrated with past issues that you aren't able to clearly see your present capabilities. You tried, but you just couldn't shut up and not say those hurtful words. You can't take them back, but you can apologize. The sooner, the better. The only word that could possibly describe how you're feeling now is 'antsy.' Uncross those hands, get up and stop pretending it isn't happening. Do something! Nail-biting doesn't count. Your guardian angel is waiting and ready to help you find the right life's work. Close your eyes and picture the path you need to follow to get there.

Im so sick of it.

Yeah as the title say, I hate how people play mind games and think its bloody fun. Well I'm not laughing and getting pretty sick of it and really over it. If that what you think of me, I know Im a better person and don't need this at all. Yeah I might be going through heaps of shit and not coping with it. Maybe it is time to move on from everything and that a scary thing but it might time to. I just want to be happy and need things in my life that will make me happy. This what they keep telling me or are you safe every day they are me. I wouldn't plan it, I would just do it and telling anyone I wouldn't do it. This is me at the moment and people just have to put up with it. Until I can get things sort in my head and heart and work out what's going on. They keep telling me things and making me think of things that make things worst for me about others and now every time I see them I think what they said. It just doesn't help me and can make things worst with my life.

Forbidden Fruit

If you're not 'supposed' to do it, if you're not supposed to like it and most definitely if it's something you've been told to never, ever even think about -- well, you're probably on your way right now to giving it a shot. And you'll enjoy it, too. You tried, but you just couldn't shut up and not say those hurtful words. You can't take them back, but you can apologize. The sooner, the better. You're a human steamroller, perfectly willing to take down anyone and anything who tries to come between you and what you want. Do try to cut down on casualties. Your guardian angel is waiting and ready to help you find the right life's work. Close your eyes and picture the path you need to follow to get there.

I'm sick

I'm so sick of the phone calls they don't help they make me feel worst. I think getting drunk would be better. Today i feel so down and out I made a big mistake. Well I feel so, well I just feel.

Another day

Yeah once again I think I need to take them all and all this will stop.

Thanks

I'm so tired but I had a good weekend with my bf this weekend. It has been a long time for us but it was worth it. Well tomorrow I have a big decision to make and have a chat with someone. I have a pisses daughter with me at the moment but let hope she gets over soon.

Thursday

Them or You? These are the times that try your soul, because deciding between the interests of your dear ones and the demands of your libido won't be an easy thing to negotiate. Ah, well. If all else fails, including the mediation of an impartial third party, take a good, long time-out. Are you spending too much time at work -- or not enough? You'll feel pulled in at least two directions, but think this through and you'll find the happy medium you need. You've got limitless energy -- in all categories. What you do with it is up to you, of course -- but feel free to be very, very creative while you're deciding.

Wed

What Obstacles Damned if you do or damned if you don't. It's certainly going to feel that way, especially if you allow yourself to be fenced in by 'shoulds.' Your mission, then, is this: despite being barraged by negativity -- and despite what seems like an endless number of roadblocks -- look elsewhere for solutions. hey're not how you'd imagined, but here they are -- ready, willing and able you back. Forget the artist's sketch in your head. Enjoy what's in front of you. Your guardian angel is waiting and ready to help you find the right life's work. Close your eyes and picture the path you need to follow to get there.

Doctors

Im so over the doctors and medication, gave more today. Have to go back in two weeks, gee once they get you they keep making you come back.

Tues

Swallow Your Pride Every so often, you have to admit that you weren't quite on target -- not necessarily wrong, you understand, but definitely not right. Well, guess what? Yep. Do it graciously, and you'll be proud of yourself. Then do something fabulously nice to reward yourself. No matter what you say, your Friends responds like you're just started speaking in tongues. Take the hint. Don't tackle any topic trickier than what you thought of the movie. Admit your errors. Smile, nod and shrug your shoulders -- a lot. Then go back to your room, lock yourself in a closet and have a tantrum, with no expletives deleted. It's not that you really believe that you're superior to everyone else -- it's not that at all. After the coup you've pulled off, however, you may begin to privately daydream about how benevolent you'd be if you were to become ruler of the world. Okay, take a breath. Modesty first. On top of the world -- trite as it may sound, that's how you're feeling. Don't be stingy. Take someone along for the ride.

Afraid

Sometime

Sometimes I wish this stuff would hurry up and works, at the moment I need to walk more and my hand is a little sore well heaps sore. My brain just wont stop and Im trying not to say things that I will regret. I want to say more and want to talk to someone but is finding it hard just encase I say something wrong. Things are going through the head and just wont stop, I'm on edge all the time. Just wants things to stop and really stop.

Stacey

I can't believe my baby girl is going to be 16teen tomorrow. Where has the time gone, when I remember, when the first time I saw her, I feel in love and the love that was shown that day. Then her first day at school and got in trouble for punching a girl. Her realise was she wouldn't leave me alone. Now she is in year 10. God where has the time gone. I love you stacey and happy birthday for tomorrow. Tomorrow means so much to me, it was the day I had Stacey on my own, even know I was on my own there was so much love in that room and she is so close to her sister and brother because of it. Even though I had my sisters there and my girls, I was still alone. I held her so tight I didn't want to let her go. The tears are rolling at the moment and I feeling this is the end of all the closeness we will share, she has grow so much. In to a beautiful young lady and amazing person and caring. I will never forget all the heart ache you had on your life and seen. Your ups and down with friends and your family. watching what Im going through has made us even closer and I have always protect you from all the harm in the world and I will always will. You have a very special place in my heart and no one can fill that part because it yours only, just as your sisters and brother has one to.

Giving Up

All I want

sometimes I wish things were so different but there not and I need to get use it to it. I wish I could take them all at least it might stop. I think one not enough if I take them all then it might stop.

Life is not a bed of roses

Some days it hard to be me, I put a good show on. What going on inside of me no one knows they see the other side of me but never the real me. The pain is so real and it hurts, it has for days and days. I just wish, well I just wish. Is all Im going to say.......... Cheers Deb

Mum's the word

You'll be dealing with your share of nervous energy, which could be a bit disconcerting to others. Too much tapping of the fingers and watching of the clock could make anyone nuts. Besides, isn't there something you really need to say? If that's what's causing all this, just say it! You've had all the bickering you can stand. You're ready to deliver an extremely terse good-bye. Just be sure you don't rush out immediately to find yourself another worthy opponent. After weeks of imploring a certain someone for five teeny, tiny minutes together, they've unexpectedly suggested an entire evening. Tonight. Unfortunately, your place is a mess. So what to do? Duh -- have dinner out. Your guardian angel is waiting and ready to help you find the right life's work. Close your eyes and picture the path you need to follow to get there. If you're with someone whose ego tends to be easily bruised, think before you speak. Tact and diplomacy may not be at the very top of your list of talents now. So are you willing to hold back, or eager to let them know what's on your mind? The easy thing isn't always the right thing. Remember that if you're tempted to ease out of a tough situation through humor or the age-old technique of avoiding the issue. Not saying what you want to will be challenging, and you may have some excess energy you'll need to dispel. Gosh, what are you going to do with it? You won't be alone unless you want to be -- but you probably will want to be. So while you have time, explain to your dear ones that you may not be around as much as usual, but that it has nothing to do with them. Think of it as an ounce of prevention. A tendency to overestimate your own abilities is a side effect of the tremendous amount of physical energy you've been temporarily endowed with. Promising more than you're sure you can deliver is the worst of it. The best of it is your willingness to die trying. You just can't seem to stop replaying that comment they made over and over in your mind. It's time to figure out why. Believe it or not, you really aren't ten feet tall and bulletproof. However, you are extremely powerful right now, both physically and mentally. You're a combination accountant, strategist and political advisor at the moment. What you do with all this great analytical stuff is up to you, but if you're smart, you'll think big, aim at the heart of the matter and expect nothing but complete and total success. You've been quite understanding for some time now, in many categories. It's time for you to call in all those favors you've built up. If you don't have a press secretary, photographer and personal assistant, you should probably ask around for a few numbers. Managing your social schedule at the moment isn't something you'll want to do alone. Of course, you might also enlist the aid of that delightful new friend of a friend. t's impossible to stop you from trying what you think you need to do, and even more difficult to talk you out of saying what's on your mind. Forget trying to stay out of the spotlight, because it's out of the question now. Wear sunscreen if you have to -- the glare will be intense.

Today

Today hasn't been a good day, so tired. I feel like Im going to fall apart but Im trying to hold it together. I have upset Lisa and she not talking to me. As I said a shit day day.

Im not

I not going crazy as I thought I was, it was nice to know that I'm not!!!!!!

my new Grandson

Today my daughter Lisa had her baby, he is so beautiful and she was amazing. Here are some picture of him. I was how many of my mates congrata me on him today and how much they care for my daughter. Connor James 8lb, 51 cm born on the 8/11/11

Today

Today the day, Lisa has her c section and I have been up all night, really scared for her and excited as well. She finally gets to meet her son and I finally get to see my grandson. I don't know what time this will happen but at least this day here. Well that's it for now and I will put photos on here later. Cheers Deb

Céline Dion - Goodbye's (the saddest word) live

This is the most beautiful song I have heard and it has made me cry over and over. It right it hard to say goodbye but we all do sometime in our life. My heart and soul is hurting with this song because this how my children feel.

All by myself - Celine Dion

Missing

Things are going missing lately and it starting to worry me, but I have a feeling who it is bit I need to find out if it true. I would be very upset if it is because it my stuff that has gone. Some of it very much personal and means a lot to me.

head

I'm so tired of everything and I know I am so scared, life is hard but is it. My head is doing stuff and it bloody hurts so much and I can not control it. I hate it and its the worst feeling out. I wish people were in my head and then they might realise it not easy. Your here and your there and I want control of me but I can't and it hurts me so much. So who will care if I just go and run as far I can so things will stop. Well that enough said, I have said to much.

Who would

Sometimes I wonder who would care if I just disappeared, probably no one.

So over

My head so over the place and I don't seem to understand why and i don't like. I should be writing stuff up and I just cant get my head around it. It so not me and I really can't handle it at all. I need to be better but it just not. why WHY WHY.