Really had enough

Everyday I go to the gym, at the moment its really hard to get up and go. I'm trying to every morning. Then I come home and sit all on my own and some days I just want someone to just hang with. I'm so sick of crying everyday this is all I do. I might not be the best company, but just wish someone would say hey just you and I go out. It doesn't matter where. Yeah I had people asked but they are  not who I need or want. So I decide well that the case I will be by myself and I don't need anyone, anymore. Spoke to my mum this morning, maybe knowing my brother David needs us, maybe she might not give up. I have been talking to my dad and my nanna so much over last few days, I hurt so much and no one here to help. I'm trying to stop myself from just giving up...